January is over and with it so is Dr. Love's OB rotation at our county hospital. I'm glad it's over with as it was wearing us both down. The schedule, the other staff, the patients, all of it was wearing us down.
There seems to be some cosmic cruelty in being thrust into a OB rotation when you're in the thick of fertility testing and treatment. He would wake up early to get there by 5:30am to treat what could have been the casting call for MTV's 16 and Pregnant or Teen Mom seasons 3-5. 16 year olds with their 20-something year old baby daddies, and their 14 year old sisters who were also pregnant. 29 year old grandmothers. 24 year olds having their 6th child. Mothers to be who had been on drugs, etc. etc. These are just some of the stories he's told me and I know he doesn't tell me all the cases he runs into. He even had a dream where a school bus full of pregnant girls pulled up to the hospital for him to treat.
These patients cause us to ask THE question that all couples struggling with fertility ask. Why? Why does it come so easy for them when they're not ready to care for a child and it is so hard for us when we have done everything right and are emotionally and financially able to give a child a good home? Why them not us?
What's the point or the purpose?
I don't know that we'll ever have the answer but I hope one day we can stop asking the question.