Sunday, August 7, 2011

There's a bean in there.

This week we had our long awaited first ultrasound.  In the days leading up to it I felt excited, nervous and a bit terrified.  What if nothing was there or there was no heartbeat?  This week was extemely busy at work with the day of and after my ultrasound being critical days that I wouldn't be able to take off should we get bad news.  Again Dr. Love comforted me and talked me off my stressful ledge.  I don't know what I'd do without him.  
The appointment started like so many other ultrasound appointments I've had but I anxiously watched the screen praying to see something there.  "There's the yolk sac, and there's the fetal pole, and that little flicker above the cursor is the heartbeat."  Her words were music to my ears and a wave of relief came over me. 
Baby's 1st picture
So far the little bean is measuring right on track and has a perfect little heart beat of 152 bpm.  We have an official due date of March 19th.  It is amazing, albeit still a bit surreal, to know that there's a little person growing in there.  As easily as I cry when I'm stressed or upset, I'm a bit surprised that I didn't shed any tears suring the scan. 

Dr. Love had the day off and when I came home from work to find flowers and a onesie set that I've had my eye on for over a month.  "It's time for us to start getting excited about it," he said as he gave me a big hug.

Since the scan I'm feeling more relaxed and starting to get more excited but I still can't completely belive it's happening.  I'll confess that even though we both really really want this, and we worked so hard to get here I still wonder at times "holy cow what did we just do."  I'm hoping that's pretty normal and will subside as things develop to where I look/feel pregnant and the bean starts looking more like a baby.

Otherwise, how am I feeling?  The nausea is here in almost regular daily waves but so far it hasn't brought its friend vomitting.  Bloat and exhaustion are here too still making it difficult to do anything in the evenings other than be a lump on the couch. 

We go back this next week to get another look and hopefully get our walking papers to graduate from the RE.  I think this next wait will be much easier to bear than the first.


  1. Go Sun Devils... and congratulations on your sprouting bean:-)

  2. I can already tell that is a beautiful baby you have there! Take it easy and enjoy some rest here and there...totally knocking on wood for you so the morning sickness stays away!

  3. i completely understand, but from a slightly different perspective. my DrH and I are actually REALLY good at getting pregnant. but for us, the problem is *staying* pregnant. we've been blessed with one beautiful little girl, and that seemed like a miracle. and after suffering yet another miscarriage in june, it gets to be so devastating. when i found out i was pregnant with my girl, i struggled to get attached because i had been hurt what felt like a million times before. i clung to EVERY SINGLE ultrasound. when the Dr would listen for the heart i would hold my breath just in case.

    i had extremely bad hyperemesis and had to regularly go in for infusions. but i never got mad bc i kept thinking, "sickness is bad. sickness means pregnant". so if you're a little shaky and nervous, celebrate those moments of nausea because they mean you're still pregnant!!!

    a million happy wishes!


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