Tuesday, June 28, 2011

One is the loneliest number

Last weekend it was time once again for my monitoring ultra sound.  If nothing else at least it feels like this cycle is passing quickly.  As usual, I started to feel nervous in the hours leading up to the scan.  I won't drag it out and leave you in suspense, the results were nothing new.  One single 19mm follicle on the left ovary and good uterine lining.  I think we have successfully established that this 50mg dose of Cl.omid just gets me up to operating at a "normal" level of one follicle with alternating ovaries.  Normal is great...if you haven't been working at this for over a year already and had hoped to be pregnant several cycles ago.  I think we've finally established that if we aren't successful this round that we'll be doing something different next cycle, though I'm not counting us out this time around.

I did have a brief infertile panic attack before my appointment.  My doctor's office calls my trigger shot and progesterone supplements into a small specialty pharmacy that has a location right above their office.  I don't typically use this pharmacy for other medications and I usually only stop by when I have an appointment at my RE's.  Since my Saturday monitoring appointment was the first time I was going to be at the office this cycle I figured I would make one stop and show up a few minutes early to pick up my prescription before my appointment.  So imagine my surprise when I walked up to the pharmacy to find the door locked, the lights turned off and a sign that read they were open Monday through Friday.  My heart started to race as fears that I had just ruined the cycle filled my head.  I sent an urgent text message to my father, a pharmacy manager at one of the big pharmacy chains, to see if they happened to regularly stock the meds...they don't.  It was an IF nightmare, following my protocol to a T and putting myself through 2 weeks of hormones only to drop the ball at the goal line.  Luckily my nurse saved the day as she remembered that the specialty pharmacy had a location a half hour away that was open until 12:30 on Saturdays.   With the clock ticking away, once my appointment was done I hustled to get across town before they closed.  I made it just in time and breathed a sigh of relief that I hadn't screwed up the rest of our cycle.  I guess I will be making a point to get to the pharmacy sooner the next time around...if there is a next time around.

In addition to my panic attack I did get a nice little surprise while sitting in the waiting room.  Dr Love was on call that day so I went to the appointment by myself, which wasn't anything new as I've attended most of the appointments alone.  In the midst of trying to solve my shot dilemma I received a text from Dr Love that he was on his way.  The senior residents were kind enough to cover the floor for a hour in order for Dr Love to be able to come.  Even though it was only for a short period of time I know we both appreciated the fact that he was able to be there.  He wants to be involved but like a lot of husbands whose wives are having fertility treatments, he struggles with feeling out of control of the situation.  He's not the one taking the medications, dealing with the side-effects, or having regular dates with Wanda (the vag cam).  The only thing he can do is be supportive and one of the ways he can do that is to come to my appointments but his schedule has made it difficult to do that.  He definitely paid for that hour off the rest of the day and evening as there was a never ending stream of patients/admits at the hospital once he returned.  Regardless I think he'd say it was worth it to be there with me.

Now we wait to see if we finally got that winning follicle.  At the very least I find comfort that if we don't, we will have a more aggressive approach next round.  Fingers crossed.  

3 comments:

  1. Crossing my fingers that this is it! I had a miniature meltdown last cycle when Giant Eagle couldn't fill my script. Here's hoping this 2WW isn't too bad.

    By the way I nominated you for an award over on my blog, stop by and pick it up if you wish. Ashley

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  2. Yay for the folli! I hope this is the one and you get your BFP and don't have to have any other Rx nightmares! Glad DH was able to be there for you.

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  3. Hoping good things for you this month! And so glad DH could make it there with you. I know what you mean when you talk about hubby feeling out of control of the situation, and not being able to fix it. My DH is the same.

    Pretty sure I'm having some luteal phase deficits myself...and that I had an early MC (chemical pregnancy) last cycle. Happy to feel like at least I'm fertilizing, but not so happy that this is the 3rd time this has happened to me. Hopeful that they "say" it is a relatively easy fix. 2 years of this hasn't been so easy! They have me back on progesterone cream, and I swear it is giving me these monstrous headaches daily! All worth it if it works, right? This cycle went by quickly for me, too. Back to the 2WW already.

    Love you.

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